June 2012

Region’s Cutest Baby Nom Noms Grapes at Vinyard – EXCLUSIVE Director’s Commentary

by Hank Thompson on June 23, 2012

YouTube is where stars are born. Stars such as kittens sleeping with puppies, ducks befriending foxes, and turtles humping shoes. And babies. Babies smiling. Babies giggling. Babies eating stuff.

I’ve been related to several babies and one of the ones my brother and his wife created was with us at family friend’s vinyard. We noticed he was enjoying the Smuck out of some grapes so like all weird uncles I whipped out my iPhone and started filming against his will and despite his lack of sentience.

What was born was the YouTube sensation (15 hits as of this post): Region’s Cutest Baby Nom Noms Grapes at Vinyard.

To help it stand out amongst the teething masses I made a trailer. Because it’s a trailer it spoils the entire film. Here it is:

And here’s the full length film:

Special thanks to Coldplay for letting me use their song, Paradise. Those dudes are gonna make it someday.

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Wear Your Sunscream

by Hank Thompson on June 23, 2012

This guy drove a milk truck for 30 years. Now the left side of his face appears far more aged than his right. He’s only 66. (via GapersBlock.com)

Click the image to read the article. It’s called photo-aging, a result of longterm exposure to UVA rays. He hopes to surgically repair the left side of his face but he could also get a milk truck with the steering wheel on the right and work for another 30 years. That’s the solution I came up with.

I actually find the image kind of hard to look at, no offense to the gentleman in question. No doubt he’s a nice man. He delivers milk! How could he not be?

It’s a stark reminder of the inevitability of getting old and that youth is temporary. I inherited from my father a fear of old age and view my later years with dread. Friends dying, body falling apart inside and out, hope waning, pill organizers, smelling like wet burlap, falling asleep at bus stops, weird yellowed spatulas and cutting boards, etc.

Whelp, I’m off to buy sunscreen.

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dumbass skates into wall. (with bruise!)

by Hank Thompson on June 14, 2012

Finally got around to putting this up. It’s been sitting on my computer for a few years. It’s a man almost killing himself for absolutely no reason.

It occurred to me a few days after it happened how close I came to doing some serious damage. That could’ve easily snapped my neck or cracked open my head. Death would have been preferable to becoming a drool factory that can’t scratch an itch. The take-away is: if you haven’t ice skated in twenty years don’t challenge the wall to duel. Even if you don’t lose, you won’t win.

Luckily, along with a slightly bruised knee, this was the extent of the injury.

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InkyTweet – Zombie Makeup Sex

by Hank Thompson on June 14, 2012

Click to make bigger.

Follow me on Twitter: @Hank_Thompson

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Widow Motel by Shawn Spear

by Hank Thompson on June 13, 2012

My friend Shawn made this. It’s really fucking good. Watch it. Full screen. Make sure the sound is up. Enjoy.

Love the animation style. Excellent use of sound and light to create mood. Not to mention efficient editing choices. And the restraint. Oh, the restraint!

I just watched it for the second time and I caught so much more detail than during the first go round. Shawn really knows what he’s doing. I know how hard he works at this stuff. Well, I don’t really know how hard he works but having made my own things I understand the level of dedication it takes to bring something from conception to actual final output, especially while slogging through the energy suck that is a day job and the constant onslaught of modernity’s distractions. Ideas are easy. Follow-through is hard. Good for him.

I’d love to see Shawn find purchase in a career or field that uses these skills and allows them to develop and flourish. (yes, I’m also talking about myself.)

Whelp, off to see if the whole wheat beard is dry on my macaroni self-portrait.

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Get Caught Up on the Podcast

by Hank Thompson on June 9, 2012

I’ve been lazy/busy/distracted/out of it lately so I haven’t kept up with linking to the podcast episodes on here as they are released. I am sorry. I promise I will not commit such a heinous act again for the next few months.

Anyway, here are links to get us up to speed. Even if you don’t know who these fuckfaces are please give it a listen. They’re my fuckfaces and they will become your fuckfaces and then we can all facefuck together, okay fuckface?

(sorry, ‘fuckface’ is my new favorite word, fuckface.)

Episode 80 – Sean Flannery – “I consider the NFL to be borderline evil.” Join the thousands and thousands of Chicagoans that have seen his one man show “Never Been to Paris” at The Comedy Bar, Thursdays. It’s grab-your-tits funny.